Thursday, August 15, 2013

The White Queen: OH NO SHE DI'N'T

SPOILER ALERT:  I have watched ONE episode of The White Queen on Starz. 
Don't think I won't use this bitch...

Holy SHITE.  Sorry to be so crass right out of the gate, but there is just NO other way around it.  This show is goooooooood.  And ALL I could think during the whole, bloody episode was "THIS IS WHAT OUTLANDER IS GOING TO BE LIKE!!!!!"  (Yes.  The shouty caps are necessary.)

First off...this show is GORGEOUS.  With none of the cheese factor of Camelot (which I LOVED, by the way, and highly recommend.  That is not a diss.  Philip Winchester and Joe Fiennes are beYOND.)

Yeah...yeah...
Just put a ring on it, chumley.
Secondly, it has my #1 criteria for an awesome show: the "Oh no she di'n't" factor.  And there is a LOT of it.  When Edward gave the priest a funny look, I was like "Uh oh.  Something's not right."  So you think I'd have figured it out already by the time Elizabeth's brother told her Edward has done this before and the priest was a fake.  At that point, I sat straight up on the edge of the couch and said (say it with me, now): "OH NO HE DI'N'T!!!!!!"  To which my husband replied, "HOW did you NOT see this coming?!?"  I said "Well...I kinda did...but...but..." and really had no response after that.

So then - when Edward stands his badass self up and tells everyone "I have married Lady Elizabeth" ?!?  There were not enough "oh no he di'n'ts" in this WORLD to define that kind of drama!  This show has more twists and turns than that nauseating teacup ride at Disney.  IT'S DELICIOUS!!!

"Ain't no one shavin' MY forehead."
And Edward's mother?!  Holy crap!  When Elizabeth meets her and double teams her with her own mother, Jacquetta...and Cecily has to BOW TO THE QUEEN?!?  It's PRICELESS!!  There is more drama and bitch-factor in that one scene than every episode of General Hospital and Young and the Restless put together!!!

And I will admit, I kept wondering "How much of this stuff even happened the way they're portraying it to have happened?"  I am dying to Google...but being the spoiler freak I am, I will refrain.  I don't even want to know what happened in real life, let alone on the show.  Yes, I am a Tudorphile...but more 16th century Tudors...not 15th century Tudors and their enemies.  So I suppose I'll be googling away when these 10 episodes are over.

One totally strange-yet-interesting thing that has always fascinated me about that time period is that the women plucked out their eyebrows and shaved or plucked their hair at the hairline to have a smooth appearance and elongated forehead underneath their (very odd) headdresses.  Clearly everyone has all their hair on this show.  My god.  Everyone is stunning.  (Again - get ready for Outlander, y'all!)

ALSO...I'm dying to know if the god awful story of the "Princes in the Tower" will be covered on this show.  Do NOT CLICK THAT LINK if you don't like spoilers.  TRUST me.  I'm just wondering if - and how - they'll cover THAT.  If not in this series...perhaps the next (will there be one?)

Can't WAIT for Sunday.  The White Queen AND Breaking Bad.  IT'S LIKE MY BIRTHDAY!!!





1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Carol,
this series is terrific! the cast is fantastic, British, and the acting is super. the scene with king edward's mother and janet mcteer and daughter was riveting and the screenplay even improved on the book--how many series or movies can do that? i'm ever hopeful for the starz version of outlander! i wasn't a fan of camelot, as i couldn't get past arthur's odd ears. sorry! --julie in jersey