Monday, April 28, 2014

Game of Thrones: Awesome! No Wait... Ew.


SPOILER ALERT:  LOOK AWAY!!!  I have seen up through "Oathkeeper" (season 4, episode 4). 


How did I not see that Grandmama killed Joffrey??? Hot diggity.  I knew I loved that woman from Day 1.  And I ALSO knew - somewhere in my subconscious - she wouldn't let Margaery marry him.  How did I not see it??

OMG OMG OMG Margaery going to see Tommen in the middle of the night.  Oh she is deliciously conniving.  BUT - I am so sceeved.  How the frig OLD is this kid??  Oh gross gross gross.  Game of Thrones is bizarre...but THIS bizarre??  Are you KIDDING ME??

Brienne loves  Jaime.  I know she does. I'm dying to see them hook up.  Dying.  Why?  I have no idea.  It would be a) cute and b) a train wreck moment of epic proportions.  You know she'd  be on top.

Did those of you who read the books see this change of heart coming with Jamie Lannister?  He went from Douche Extraordinaire to Hottie McSoftie in the course of one season!  My lord he is fine.  Just LOOK at that man.  Brienne Loves herself some him.  And I don't care what they say...I didn't see last week's sex-next-to-the-body-of-their-asshole-son creepshow as rape.  Cersei was holding his face and kissing him while saying "stop it".  It seemed to me like she wanted to...but realized it was pretty creepy since Jackass Joffrey was lying right there with cucumbers in his eyes.  Beyond the whole brother/sister grossness, that is.

Also love how Jamie is protecting Sansa.  He knows his batshit cray cray girlfriend sister will have her killed...and SHE'S such a dumbass, she reminded him of his oath to Catelyn Stark...so now he's sending Brienne out to save her!!!  MEANWHILE...Brienne might want to rethink that decision...because if Jaimie ever got near Sansa, he'd want to hop on pop now that he's a free man.  AND she's a virgin.  Something tells me Hottie McSoftie would dig himself some untouched Stark ass.  And lordddddd...get her away from that sadist, Littlefinger!!  Ewwww...he is so gross, I can't even stand to look at him on the screen!  (OK so I said that about Edmure - aka Tobias Menzies - and yet now I love him so much I started Tobias Tuesday...but that's another story, entirely.)

OMG George RR Martin is obsessed with rape and dominance.  No wonder he and Diana Gabaldon breakfast together once a month.  I wonder if they trade ideas.

Love Khaleesi wielding her power all over the place.  I saw in the scenes for next week that she asks about King's Landing.  DOH.  Send her ass in there to rescue Tyrion before someone kills him!!!

Ooooh...Khaleesi-Tyrion.  Khaleesi-Terion.  Trask-Radio!!!  WHAT A POWER COUPLE THAT WOULD BE!!!!

GROSSSSSS.  OMG that cute little baby.  Aaaaand this is where Carol turns off the TV and goes to bed.  Lorddddddd I am not cut out for this show sometimes.  I don't even know WHAT that White Walker did with his Lee Press-on nail...but something tells me it was not tickle his chin whilst cooing "coochie coochie coo."  Bloooort!!!!!

OK - just googled and now realize all he did was turn the babe into a White Walker.  Could've been worse (insert WTF face here).


Monday, April 7, 2014

TURN: Damn! This Show is Good!

What do you think this is? The Patriot?!
SPOILER ALERT:  I have watched one episode of TURN on AMC.

OK this will be quick because we're only one ep in.  Not sure this is a bloggable show...but let me say I LOVED it.  I grew up in the Valley Forge, PA area and now live in Monmouth county in New Jersey...so believe me when I say that I am a total Revolutionary War lover.  This show is right up my alley.

Heather Lind as Anna Strong
Move it on over, baby girl.
I'm stealin' your man.
So I couldn't help noticing the relationship between the Abraham and Anna. Oooh girlfriend is playin' both sides!  She clearly still digs Abe and is married to that poor soul who is rotting in jail after spending a lovely, fun-filled rainy night on the pillory.  Poor Mary, Abe's wife.  She doesn't stand a chance with all her sweetness and light.  Anna is going to hit that marriage upside its head with all her colonial feminine wiles.

tu-s1-simcoe-590
I like my skivvies starched, bitch. 
Simcoe is a delicious douche.  I hope they don't kill him any time soon because he's just too good of an actor to only make it an ep or two.

Ben Talmadge is a reason to watch, alone.  That's one hot colonial, right there.

Now, is it me, or is Major Hewlett the biggest wuss to ever walk the planet?  Egads...talk about someone who isn't necessary.  He annoys me by just sitting there, eating steak and being his wussy self.

OK seriously - not much more to say at this point.  Can't wait for next week!!

Reign - The Consummation

SPOILER ALERT:  I have watched up through The Consummation. 

WTF?  I am so...not confused...just...confused.

First off - I should be happy that Mary and Francis are married.  But I'm still so pissed off at Mary.  They ruined the whole friggin romance.

Secondly...MAN did she drop Bash like a HOT POTATO.  Now I feel bad for HIM!  And Francis hates him!  Come on, Francis...what would YOU have done if all that shit was dropped in your lap?  The same damned thing!  And poor Bash.   The whole time he and Mary were "together", all he did was run around like her lap dog, fixing all her problems.

Francis got to sleep with her and all you got was...

TO WATCH FRANCIS SLEEP WITH HER!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!

That was nuts!!!  They all stood around watching... and Lola was literally cringing.  That was some EXCELLENT drama right there.  Not even any blankets!  Just wham, bam, thank you, Mary...in that awful night dress thing.  And Francis was all "That's right...I can get it up...watch THIS!"

And NOW Nostradamus realizes he was wrong?  And I guess he's going to set out to kill Clarissa to make it all right...which is so awful.  And sad.  Queen Catherine should feel a lot worse than she does about the fact that that poor girl had such a shitty life.  OMG.

Ew and not that it deserves mention...but what's with Kenna?  Get me a hubby and I'll shag your brains out until you do?  What's with that??  She's so gross.  And she wasn't all that nice to Lola.  Geez.  Lola's looking OUT for her well being.  I can't even stomach her.

Long live the queen.  SO glad Catherine's not going to die any time soon.  Let's be honest; she's the show.

OH WAIT - Marie de Guise.  What do you think of Amy B?  I wanted to hate her (because her non-accent is so not spectac) but she's really good.  SO much fun.  It's like watching Cora and PaPA's mothers go at it on Downton!  FanTAStic!

OK...so...now we wait.  Another week of wondering what will happen.  And if you've studied history...you - like me - probably don't even want to know.